Walking With Angels by Emanuel Xavier

Walking With Angels

for Lindsay

knows the condom wrapped penetration
of strangers and lovers, deep inside
only a tear away from risk

knows bare minimum t-cell level counts,
replacing intoxicating cocktails
with jagged little pills

knows how to avoid a cure thanks to war
how to keep pharmaceutical corporations
and doctors in business

knows the weight loss desired
by supermodels,
knows the fearless meaning of a friends genuine kiss or hug
converts non-believers to religion
and spirituality

comprehends loneliness
values the support of luminaries
smiles at the solidarity
of single red ribbons

knows to dim the lights
to elude detection
how to shame someone into hiding
from the rest of the world
to be grateful for the gift of clothing
and shelter,
to remain silent, holding back the anger and frustration

knows that time on earth
is limited for all of us
that using lemons to make lemonade is better than drinking the Kool-Aid
but no matter how much you drink
you are always left dehydrated

knows working extensive hours
to pay hospital bills,
the choice of survival
or taking pleasure in what is left of life

knows the solid white walls
you want to crash through
and tear down
the thoughts of suicide
in the back of your head

knows the prosperous could be doing more with their wealth
and that everyone still thinks it is a deserving fate- for gays,
drug addicts, prostitutes,
and the unfortunate children of such
born into a merciless world of posh handbags and designer jewelry

knows how to be used as another percentage to profit politicians
knows it doesn’t only affect humans
but animals too, without bias
-providing fodder for art and something to be left behind

if there is a God
he has disregarded our prayers
left his angels behind to journey along with us
-none of us knowing exactly
where we are headed

Emanuel Xavier

Emanuel Xavier
Born: 3 May 1970, New York, USA
Nationality: American

Xavier is a Latinx poet, author, spoken word artist, editor, and LGBT+ activist from the Bushwick area of Brooklyn. Once an underage hustler and drug dealer, through surviving hate crime, Xavier emerged from the East Village, Manhattan art scene, the ball culture scene, and Nuyorican movement as a successful poet, writer, and advocate for gay youth and Latinx gay literature.

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